An American in Bradford

‘An American in Bradford’

 Today I went to ‘Al-Mobeens,’ a Curry/Italian resturant, with classics such as: Chicken Tikka Calzones, Barfi, and Pizza with curry sauce.

 I began to order when the Asian guy behind the counter interrupted me:

“You’re not from around here are you?”

“Nope.”

“Canada?” (I think he’s giving me the benefit of the doubt)

“America.” 

At this point everyone I’ve ever said this too has smirked and nodded in scilence. I’ve guessed they’re doing one of two things:

1) Calculating the likelihood I voted for Bush. 

2) Wondering if there’s any possibility I could be related to Miley Cyrus.

“Ohhh, America! Which country in America are you from?”

“I am from the state of Florida.”

“California!”

“No, Florida.”

“Ohhhh, Disney world.”

“Well there’s a lot more to Florida than... yeah, Disney world.”

“You know, my cousins-girlfriends-sisters-husbands-best friend’s-uncle’s-ex-girlfriend’s- college roommate stopped in Newark airport once.” (ok, it’s not exactly that obscure... but close.)

“Wowwww, New Jersey... Did he like it?”

“Yes! He says your ‘Cinnabon,’ is this a place? - yes, your ‘Cinnabons’ are a cultural triumph!” (Hardly 5 star, but can you blame the poor guy? He’s been eating English food for god knows how long ;) couldn’t resist)

40 mins later...

“We’ve been talking here for 45 minutes, is my small fry ready?”

“What small fry?”

“The one I ordered. Remember, I gave you a 5 pound note and you asked me if I knew Kanye West? Then gave me a handful of indistinguishable coins.” (Im not sure all of them were pence either, I’m pretty sure I saw a Canadian quarter in there!)

“Oh yes! We’re out.”

“Of fries? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Ok, we’ll give you them for free.”

“I thought you said you were out?”

“Yes. Next!”

If these conversations aren’t awkward enough, throw in the added oddity that is a one pound coin. It’s thick and gold (looking...), I feel like Im paying in dabloons. 

But really, people are unbelievably nice here. They always want to know about America:

“Well, things are bigger there.”

“Like the food portions!”

“No! Like the cars and hotel rooms!”

While everyone here is becomming more and more Americanized, I have found a new hobby in collecting and repeating Yorkshire lingo. I victoriously said “bullocks” the other day without any giggling, and the joy of my triumph is beyound what I  can describe here to you. I couldn’t have felt more British if I said it sitting in a pub, listening to the Beatles, talking to Rex Harrison, complaining about the French. 

I love the quirkiness of this place. I love that being from America opens up lots opportunities for conversation. So thanks Lady Gaga, your antics make America interesting to the rest of the world.